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It was my first place independent from staying with my mother. I was beginning a new life, going to college, and working in my mid-twenties. I met a boyfriend on the internet; however, I don't believe it was actually him in the picture. The relationship started with him saying he lost his phone at the Bart station. He called me from a different number than the one that was given to me previously. He looked much older, taller, and paler than the person in the profile picture. I still went along with meeting him, which became a disaster. I welcomed him into my home, which I later found out indirectly he was linked to a Mental Health Caseworker from a program called Behavioral Health Court. The Caseworker told me that she knew a man who stayed in my apartment complex that drove a red mustang, the same kind and color as mine. I wondered how indirect her remarks were, given the fact she admitted, saying " You did not do anything to get into the behavioral health court." She seemed very well-prepared, like she was eager to get her paws on me and to meet me. It was like she had been watching and observing and just sent someone to approach me by way of the internet or any way she could arrange for my suffering from studying Web development and health education. She most likely sensed I was on psychosis, The Walking Dead, séance, and voodoo playing a role in manic episodes.
Furthermore, the relationship went on for nearly a year; he came in and out of my apartment. I wouldn't say it was a formal relationship of intimacy; it was introducing a new kind of hell into my life that depleted me, causing me to stray from my studies and enter into psychosis and then psych emergency.
"There are studies revolving around leaving partners, friends, or family members that make people suffer from mania and manic episodes of psychosis."
One day, after months of talking to him, I felt myself drifting away, sleeping for long periods of time as I went off my medication. I waited for a segue after getting into a dispute following disrespectful conduct in my home on his part. The segue was strong enough to end the relationship and permanently get him to leave my apartment. After the relationship had ended, I wiped him from my memory; he tried calling, not saying anything for nearly a month. I continuously began to drift away, entering into psychosis from all the hell that had previously developed in my life talking to him.
My mother tried calling my phone and coming by, and I ignored her, isolating myself, distancing myself from her and others around town as well. One day, I worked up enough strength to leave my apartment and check the mail. I was disturbed, remembering news broadcasts of others in psychotic episodes that led to school shootings where their motions were dragging, moving swiftly, as if someone was controlling them from a preordained plan of some kind of séance and or voodoo. I saw an old senior citizen lady, my neighbor next door; she appeared to be dragging on a walker with tennis balls on it quickly moving towards the mailboxes to be visible to me for altercations to arise. As I got closer to the mailbox, I became disturbed by her demeanor, or maybe it was the fact that I saw her talking to my mother days prior, potentially trying to come up with a solution to get me into psych emergency. The elder lady, senior citizen on the walker, at one point tried to reach out and grab me; I blocked her from grabbing me. A few hours later, my mother brought the police, and I went to psych emergency. These kinds of common things happen where people are always trying to grab me, but sometimes their successful touching and making indirect comments to provoke me into a world of trouble.
Over a year later, I entered into a program called Behavioral Health Court where I received intense counseling, therapy, group counseling, and went to NA and AA meetings regularly.
The program was 2 years. It consumed my time, my mid-20s, and was bewitching and belittling. Others in the program were not like myself; they were severe drug addicts of a different nationality and talked, once again, indirectly to provoke me, testing me and my patience every day. During this time, I don't know what I would have done if I was not prayed up and studying the Bible and sometimes working out. Working out and studying the Bible, in addition to praying every day, were very detrimental to my success in making it through the difficult times. It was hard for me to cope with the facts that the case manager admitted knowing I did not harm my elderly neighbor. She also admitted to the fact that I did not do anything to my neighbor, the elderly senior citizen lady on the walker. Admitting it was not enough; my reputation was tarnished, and if anybody wanted to draw something up about my reputation about my misconducts in life, they may try to use it as a barrier to my success.
After going to group counseling and therapy, I decided to stay silent about arguing the fact of the details of what really happened and further emphasizing the fact that I did not do anything to the senior citizen lady and she was not injured that she reached out to grab me.
Strangely in life, I have noticed when one thing happens that causes psychosis or manic episodes to arise, our experiences during manic episodes after we recover and heal from the problem if other circumstances arise it will almost be like a sequence of events and trials of the same kind that occur as if the people playing the games trying to lower you into psych emergency or a psychotic break are programmed and operated by an evil force. Again, the most common is dragging and trying to grab me, forcing themselves to communicate with me implying that I am isolating. I think it's very critical to imply a total stranger is isolating. Their behaviors of being intrusive are more important signs to recognizing a mental health challenge then mine. From my perspective this shows no concern to the root of the problem.
Thank you for letting me share with you my experience and results from my relationship as well as psychosis.
Hope you found this insightful while grasping the key components!
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